New Moon
by MariaGuerinCullenWinchester
Summary: I had thought that life couldn t get more weird. That changed the day I came to live with my father and my sister in Forks and I realized that there were more dangerous creatures around than evil aliens and evil FBI Agents.
1. Chapter 1

_**Preface **_

My life had been planned out since I could think. I wanted to be a famous singer with a lot of money, many fans and men falling down in front of me when they saw me. I would be living in a huge mansion with my best friends Liz and Alex and a few attendants. My mother would own the beautiful house besides me and she would come to visit me every day. We never would have problems with paying our bills or had to worry if the money would hold us over the water this month. That was actually how my reality had really looked like and I had hated to be the girl with the old clothes, the torn shoes and the only child in school without having a father. You see my father had gotten my mom pregnant when she was still very young and Charlie, that's my father, had tried to be a good role model. But he was just too young to handle the situation and after a year he bailed on us. Amy, my mother, had to take care of me all alone and we had to struggle to get by. I saw my father twice a year in Forks, Washington after he married a nice woman named Renee, who got pregnant from him when I was two. She had been the one getting in contact with my mother and asked her if it was okay if I would come to visit, so that I could get to know my still unborn sister. So for a few months I would spend my time with my father and his new family and even though I wanted to hate Bella, my sister, I found it hard to do so. She was so cute and tiny and I loved to smell her nice scent. I spent a lot of time with her, protecting her from other children and giving her tips to not get in trouble. When I turned six Charlie and Renee divorced as well and I feared that I would lose my sister and Renee, which I started to love like my own mother. Thankfully Bella spent her vacations with Charlie and so we saw each other like before. And I loved our meetings, because the older she got the more I could do with her. We teased the neighbour kids, we held tea parties on our lawn and we went into the forest directly behind our father's house, although we weren't allowed to go there alone. But we were really sneaky and Charlie never found out what we did. Sometimes all three of us went down to La Push to visit Billy Black and his son Jacob. They were Quileute and lived at the Indian reservation with a lot other people. I liked them and the beach there was beautiful, nothing I was used to, seeing as I was living in the alien capitol of the world, Roswell. The only thing existing there was the desert and a lot of UFO freaks. But at La Push I felt really at home, which was strange. Jacob was almost four years younger then me, but I really loved him to pieces. He was usually trying to get our interest, but Bella was always too busy with other things to notice it and I found his antics just amusing. Then I stopped visiting my dad after I got thirteen. Charlie and I got into a nasty fight about how he always seemed to love Bella more than me. One thing led to another and before I knew what I was doing I was storming out of the house. Billy found me at night time hiding in the forest, telling me that my mother was waiting for me, she was taking me back to Roswell. I gladly went with her and I didn't even look at my father once while I went out of his house. I never called him and he never tried to get in contact with me, although I was still phoning with Bella and Renee every week. They never told me how he was and I never asked. When I turned fifteen, I made a single attempt to call him. But then my life turned upside as soon as I found out my best friend Liz had been shot at and healed from an alien. He, his sister Isabel and their friend Michael Guerin were extraterrestrials and they crashed on earth in 1947. Yeah the famous UFO crash and that's no lie, I saw their pods. For three years we tried to avoid the FBI, which had been on our ass as soon as they found out that the incident in the Crash down, the restaurant where Liz and I worked was a little suspicious. Most of the time we barely escaped them and a lot of times we could prevent anything bad from happening. And still we lost Alex through the hands of Tess, who was a good actress, because we didn't notice that she wasn't exactly playing in our team. I still hate her for that and I had wished more than once that the aliens never landed here. But then I felt guilty because if they wouldn't have landed, I wouldn't have met Michael, the love of my life and the only one able to drive me crazy without even trying. We had a strange relationship. We broke up a lot, but we made up a lot, too. That was just because we were both so scared about being dependent on another person. And after the many bumps and hits we've taken we finally found a common ground. Unfortunately that was the moment Max told us that the FBI was planning to take us down. Liz, who after she had been healed developed powers saw it in one of her premonitions. So that meant leaving town and seeing as it was shortly before our graduation it was the perfect opportunity to disappear. I was scared shitless and I didn't know what to do. I mean it would be a life altering step I would take, leaving everything I knew behind and being on the run for the rest of my life. I also had to consider that I was the only one in the group without any powers and that would make me a target as well as a liability, because we wouldn't just run from humans but from evil aliens, too. And I didn't want to imagine what would happen when Michael had to constantly keep his eyes on me. I didn't want to get anyone in danger because I wasn't able to defend myself. It was a hard decision and it would have been easier if Michael wouldn't have been so understanding, telling me that no matter which decision I would choose he would still love me. Bastard didn´t know what he was doing to me. But that didn't keep me from making the biggest step I would do in my life. And at this point destiny interfered.


	2. Chapter 2

_**A call from the past**_

I was sitting on my bed, glancing at the room I had been sleeping in since my mother and I moved into this house. It had been my home for so many years and there were a lot of memories here. I chuckled when I thought about the many make out sessions I had been having on this bed with Michael when Amy was on her business trips. If she would have known that I had been having sex on her coffee table, the kitchen table and the pantry room she would have grounded me for eternity. Then my eyes settled on pillow where I usually cried in after Michael broke up with me or had just acted like a jerk towards me. It was so hard to do the right when I didn't know what the right was. Pressing my face into my blanket I screamed as loud as I could into it, letting my frustration out. Suddenly a knock was heard on my door.

"Honey, your father is on the phone. Do you want to talk to him?" my mother's voice sounded through the thick wood, making me wonder if I heard correctly. I mean the last time I spoke to Charlie had been five years ago and then I told him that I wanted to never see him again and that I hated him.

" Uh, what does he want?", despite my rather unfriendly question I was jumping on my feet and walked towards the door, just in case I really misheard what my mother told.

A quiet murmur was on the other side for a moment before my mother answered my question. "It's about Bella".

That did it, I was immediately opening the door and took the phone out of my mother's hands before she even could protest. No matter how many issues I had with Charlie, I would do anything for my little sister. "What's up with her?"

"Hey sweetie, it's nice to hear your voice again", my father's gruffy voice sounded from the other end of the line and for a moment I felt giddy to talk to him. But then I remembered that he hadn't tried once to ask about me or at least left a message for me.

So I left my feelings aside and concentrated on the situation at hand. There was something going on and I had the feeling that my little sister needed my help. I just didn't know for what. "Cut the crap, tell me what's wrong with Bella".

A slight ruffling was heard in the background, then a deep sigh and the clearing of my father's throat before he started to speak again. "She had been dating this guy and she had been so in love with him that I was afraid he would be the one taking her away from me. But a month ago he left town and broke her heart. Now she's so depressed and she doesn't want to go back to Renee. I'm way out of my league here and I need you to come here and comfort her. You're her sister and she needs you right now".

"I'm there as soon as I can", I knew all about Edward and his quite unusual character. She had told me everything in the letters she wrote me since she had moved in with Charlie. Of course he didn't know that I was still in contact with my sister.

"Thank you and..."

I didn't let him finish before I gave the phone back to my mother and went back to my room. Closing the door tightly behind me I started to pack my bags to go back to the place I swore I would never go again. But my sister was in dire need of a female person and I wouldn't let her down. I knew how it was to be left from the first love and how painful it was. Looking at the picture of Michael and me, I sat on her bed and tears were shooting in my eyes. I had been so busy with coming to Bella's rescue that I hadn't realized what it meant. Breathing through the sudden pain assaulting me I barely registered that I already made my decision and it wasn't the decision I thought I would choose. How could I just let my spaceboy go without knowing where he would go, if he would get hurt or if he was probably lying somewhere dead, worse the FBI got his hands on him and I was in Forks, safe and sound, not worrying for a moment about my life. But thinking about Michael I knew that he would have more chances of going unnoticed when he didn't have his human, vulnerable girlfriend at his side. Shaking my head I finally noticed my wet cheeks, which I tried to rub dry without any success. Then I heard the door opening behind me and I had no desire to explain to my mother why I was crying, she would just think it was because I had talked to my dad. "Go away, I don't want to talk right now".

A quiet chuckle was heard and it wasn't the female voice I had expected, but rather the deep sound of my lover. "Cool, I don't want to talk either. I've got better things to do that don't involve talking".

"Sorry, I thought you were my mom", I didn't turn around, fearing that he would just think I was being stupid for crying like that. He wasn't one for sharing his feeling with others and I knew that he wouldn't like to see me like that.

I felt the bed dip under me and his strong arms were pulling me towards him. It was pointless really, he just knew me better than anyone else and of course he would notice that something was wrong with me. In that moment I really hated him for being able to read me like a book. "What's wrong?"

I wanted to throw my arms around him and weep into his hard chest, mesmerize the smell of his scent mixed with the spicy tang of Tabasco. I wanted to beg him to go with me to Forks, to stay at my side forever. But I couldn't get the words out of my mouth. It would be the wrong thing to do. "Don't worry, I just talked to my father and I wasn't exactly nice to him", straightening my composure I glanced at him, wondering if I looked as silly as I felt for losing it like that. "What brings you here? And you've taken the door this time".

"I want to ask you something and you have to promise me that you don't think, just say the first thing popping in your head".

I was a little speechless, confused and nervous. I mean he wasn't usually so strange, at least in that area. He was fidgety and I was stunned what had gotten into him. For a split second I was scared he would propose to me, but I knew that he wasn't like that and was just imagining or wishing it would be something like that... "Okay".

He pulled a small box out of his pants and for seconds my heart stopped beating before it started to get into a sprint. I thought it wanted to escape my throat, my cheeks felt hot and sweat was forming above my lips. Then he took my left hand in his bigger one and I thought I would be throwing up. "I know it's the worst moment to do something crazy like that, but we haven't been normal to begin with. We had our ups and downs, well that was mostly my fault. I couldn't believe that something so pure like you would want someone so tainted like me and it made my afraid that you would one day realize that you deserved better than me. I wouldn't have survived that and so I pulled back from you, although I should have held you stronger. You were always there for me when nobody else had, you supported me when not even I believed in myself and you gave me a home, a place I wanted to be. This time I want to give you something back and I already asked your mum for permission. I still don't know if she said yes through her tears or not. But I wanted to do this the traditional way", when he went down on one knee I felt a fresh round of tears welling up in my eyes. He was doing all this for me and it made me so happy and so sad at the same time. "Maria Carmen DeLuca would you do me the honour of becoming my wife and make me the happiest alien on this planet?"

"I want nothing more than to be your wife and make you happy, but I can't. Not yet at least", the moment the words escaped me, I regretted them when I saw his face crumble with hurt. He was backtracking really fast and I was afraid that he would put his walls back up, locking himself inside his protection again and leaving me outside. I didn't want that, not after seeing what a beautiful person he was underneath all. Grasping his hand to prevent him from leaving I had to use all of my strength to hold him. "Don't. I didn't reject you and I didn't say no. But think about it for a moment. It's the worst time to make such a decision".

Michael was still masking his face and yet I could see the pain in his eyes. I was sure that he didn't understand what I meant, I wasn't even sure myself. But I knew it was the right thing to do. I wanted him to be safe and that meant I had to stay away from him. At least as long as the FBI was looking for him. "That's not a snap decision. I thought about that for a long time and I thought it would be the right time, seeing as you are running away with me soon".

I bite my lip to keep me from revealing the truth in my face. I didn't want to hurt him that way. I wanted to make the blow easier for him, even though I was sure that there wasn't anything that could make it better. "Yeah about that. I can't go with you. My sister needs my right now and I agreed to be there for her. I'm sorry, but I think it will be better for you if you would go without me".

"Better for me? I can't believe you're feeding me this bullshit!" he exploded, making me jump startled. He hadn't lost his temper for some time now and I was surprised about his reaction actually, although I should have expected that he wouldn't exactly happy about my suggestion.

Leaving my spot on my bed I tried to find a way to voice my thoughts to him so that he would understand that I wasn't breaking up with him or that I wouldn't want to be with him. But everything would sound so stereotyped and not me. Sighing I decided just to tell him what was on my mind. "Listen to me. You said you would accept every decision I would make and I choose to let you go", seeing him in the process to interrupt me, I lifted a hand to stop him. I needed to get that off my chest before I would forget what I wanted to say. "Think about it, you need all your strength to keep you alive, I would be just a liability to you. They're not after me, Liz didn't see me die and I will be out of Roswell anyway. Maybe Isabel can show you how to dream walk so that we can stay in contact with each other. And when you think it's safe for us, we'll meet somewhere. If you still want me to be your wife then I won't hesitate to agree".

Michael still looked doubtful, but not so angry anymore, which I thought was a plus. I didn't want him to hate me or see that hurt look in his eyes again. He meant everything to me, more than my own life. "But that could take years. How do you think I can concentrate on dodging the FBI when I will everyday wonder how you're doing, if you're still alive and if you haven't already found someone else?"

"That's were my plan with dream walking comes into play. We have already a connection and maybe we can use that to stay in contact. We could make some arrangements to report and talk to each other once a week or maybe even every two weeks", I knew it would be difficult to not have him near me all the time or to know that he was so far away from me that should really something happen, I wouldn't be able to help him. But that was a sacrifice I was going to make if that ensured me that he would be alive.

Michael meanwhile was clearly not so aversed to the idea, but not willing to give in. I noticed the way his eyes darted around, a pretty dead give away that he was already making plans to meet with Isabel. Then he glanced at me with a raised eyebrow. "Say I would agree to the plan, can I make a suggestion or two myself? Just that we have a fair trade".

I was confused and obviously a little curious what he would try to force on me. He wasn't usually someone bargaining things, he just took what he wanted without thinking about anyone else, well outside from me of course. "Yeah fine".

"Agree to my proposal, wear my ring and I want to talk to you as often as I'm able. And no having sex with other man in my absence. At least as long as we're engaged", he really stunned me sometimes. He was most of the time so deadlocked on his habits that I was sure he would never do something that would surprise me. But then he turned around and did just that. Unbelievable.

And yet I didn't want to seem to give in so easily, he was always getting so smug when he thought he won. Acting like I had to think really hard about his words, I saw his irritation grow and grow. When I realized that he would snap every minute I decided to save him the trouble. "I think you got yourself a deal".

Again he took my by surprise as soon as he started to smile brightly at me. Usually he wasn't so big with expression, aside from growling, grunting and hissing. But here and there he would give me that real smile that made my inside melt, like right now. "Can I put the ring on your finger now or do we have to negotiate again?"

I felt the corner of my lips turning up when I thought about the fabulous ring and how perfect it would fit me. Rolling my eyes theatrics, I lifted my hand so that he could pull the wonderful jewellery over my finger, which he did immediately. For the first time I saw the diamond on the silver band and the breath was knocked out of me. It was the most beautiful ring I ever laid my eyes on and I felt ashamed, because I wouldn't have expected him to have so much taste in that department. "It's perfect. I love it".

"I'm glad you like it", his eyes sparkled brighter than the ring on my finger and I felt his happiness leaking towards me. He liked to see me wearing a sign that would take me off the market and would mark me as his. I don't know why he thought he had to fear of losing me. If I haven't left him until now I wouldn't do that so easily.

Wriggling my fingers it finally hit me that I was engaged and that we would be apart for a long time. Wrapping my arms around him I put my head on his heart to listen to the rhythm of it, mesmerizing his scent, his warmth and most of all his whole being. I would be missing to have him so close. "Can you do me a favour as well?"

Michael stopped a moment to stroke my hair and even without looking at him I knew that he must be feeling the same as me right now. Carefully he lifted my head to glance in my slightly tear stained face. "Of course".

"Be careful, don't do anything reckless and no bleached blonde girls in my absence".

He chuckled amused at the mention of Courtney, his eyes shining a little with unshed tears. It made me slightly glad that I wasn't the only one emotional at this moment. But we wouldn't see each other for a while and that gave us the right to be like that. "Done".

I caressed his cheek so tenderly like I would touch him for the first time. I knew that I would never get tired of watching him or search for something that I haven't discovered on him. This man had been meant for me and now he belonged to me. "Okay, I think we should stop with this depressing mood. We have something to celebrate and I still want to say goodbye to the others before I go to Forks".

"I already told them to meet us at the crash down", Michael ducked his head with a small smile playing on his face. He had been counting on me to say yes to his marriage proposal. I was tempted to let him go there alone just to see the reaction from the others.

Unfortunately I knew that they would never believe that, seeing as they saw how much I loved him. Especially Liz wouldn't buy that garbage, because she had been the one having been forced to listen to me rant and rave about Michael. "So sure about yourself, haven't you? Be glad that I love you so much".

He grinned at me sheepishly, looking for a moment ten years younger or at least like I think he would have looked at this age. He was just a big kid. Shaking my head I retrieved a jacket from my wardrobe before joining him again. Together we went out, well at least after my mother cried happily about her little baby marrying. She didn't listen when I told her that we would wait for some time before tying the knot, she just embraced us with her tears streaming down her face and blubbering about grandchildren. At that point we disappeared really fast, telling her that we would tell our friends the news. They already expected us when we arrived at the Crash Down, everyone was sitting at our usual booth, curiously looking around. As soon as they saw us coming in with our hands linked together they jumped to their feet to congratulate us. A few times I feared I would be crushed with all those arms trying to wrap around me. Liz and Isabel were immediately talking about a date so that they could be present at the big day. Kyle and Max were making fun of Michael for letting himself get tied up from a girl. But he countered with the fact that he didn't have to impress anyone and that he would never had to fear to not get laid, compared with a glare in Kyle's direction and it was obvious that it was a dig about the ex jock. After the excitement died down, I finally found the opportunity to tell them about my plan to leave alone and go to Forks to my father and my sister. Everyone was shocked, which was visible at the strange glances they shot at Michael as soon as I uttered the words. Instantly they tried to convince me that I wouldn't be a liability and that the safest place for me would be at the side of Michael. But then I told them about my objections and after a while they accepted my choice. Despite the feeling of goodbye the evening was wonderful and I collected many memories that I would always carry with me. That night I spent with Michael and we never let each other go until the sun was getting up and I had to make my way home. When I departed from his home, after we stopped crying, I was on my way to pack the rest of my things and say goodbye to my mom before leaving town. I knew it wasn't forever, but it felt to me like that. When I was in the process to call for a ticket to Forks my mother stunned me with the words that I wouldn't need that because I could take the Jetty. She had wanted to give the car to me for my graduation day, but seeing as I wasn't there she was giving it to me now. I was surprised about the offer, even though I wondered how she would drive around without a car, but she told me that she wanted to look for a new car anyway so it wouldn't be such a big deal for her. And the fact that Jim Valenti, her boyfriend again would take her to work every morning was making me a little relived, even though the thought to leave my mom alone with Jim was slightly troublesome. After I promised her to call as soon as I would be arriving with Charlie, we embraced each other and then I went away.

So that was the point where I was on my way to Forks to live with my father and my sister. At this point my story really begins.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

_**Same old same old**_

When I drove through Washington with the music blaring loudly in the car and the rain was tapping on my window, I finally realized what I haven't missed all those years. Forks, contrary to Roswell, had the most raining days in America. The sun was pretty much deserting this spot, which explained the many green colors as I crossed the city limit. After living near the desert for so long I was used to the heat waves, the ice cold nights and the slightly brown surroundings. But this was such a change in scenery that I was stunned how I ever liked it here. Chuckling quietly I saw that most of the town was as I remembered it. Most of the shops were still there, the High school looked like it hadn't seen a different color since I had been a child and the people were even the same. Suddenly I noticed the police cruiser behind me and I sighed before I stopped the Jetty at the side. Mentally preparing myself I checked my appearance in the small mirror on the sun visor. I knew that I wouldn't get a ticket, because for one I hadn't been driving too fast and secondly I was the daughter from the Sheriff. Chief Swan was my father and he probably recognized the car from my mother. Hearing the tender knocking on my window I turned to the face greeting me. Charlie looked older and a little unkept, but strangely still like the man I had seen five years ago. Opening the door I stepped out, I didn't want to have a conversation with him looking down at me. It made me a little uncomfortable.

"Hey Rica, it's good to see you again", he was just as nervous as I appeared. We haven't exactly parted under the best conditions. Even though I felt a little bad for treating him like that, I still was mad at him for not once trying to talk to me.

I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him with as much indifference as I could muster. I couldn't forgive him for just giving up on me like that. He hadn't even fought to keep me. "Hey Charlie. It has been a long time".

Charlie scratched his eyebrow and I was immediately thinking about Michael. He was doing that, too. Mostly when he didn't know what to say or to phrase something correctly. It was adorable, at least on my spaceboy. It looked kinda odd on my father. "Can we put our differences aside for Bella? She has enough problems. I don't want to add our little fights to that".

"Fine with me. We wouldn't want to upset your favourite daughter, would we?" I hadn't meant to say that, but it just slipped past my mouth and I wished I could have taken that back. I hadn't come to continue our little feud with each other. "Forget I said that. Just show me a nice hotel and I can be on my way again".

Charlie sighed sadly and for the first time I saw some other expression on my father's face aside from his usual mask he had been wearing outside from his job. It had always bugged me that he hadn't been able to express his feelings like everyone else. Well maybe not so openly like my mom had always done it. A few words that made me realize that I meant something to him would have been enough for me. But he hadn't even managed that. "Don't be stupid. You're sleeping at our house. I still have your things in your room".

I was a little surprised about that statement and slightly moved. After the way I had been behaving I would have taken all of my things and burned it. But maybe he wasn't as bad as I had made him out to be, maybe my mother had been right and I had been basing my opinion on my hurt feelings. "I don't want to intrude".

"That's still your home, too. And it would make Bella happy to have you near again".

I gave in, for once I put my ego out of the way and reacted like an almost grown up woman should do. Mom would be so proud of me when she could see that. I had to tell her that when I would call her. "Okay".

So we drove to the old house, which like the rest of the town hadn't changed in the least and strangely I felt really home, like I was visiting my Dad on my summer vacations. Charlie was playing the perfect gentleman and carried my luggage into my old room. It still was like I remembered it, my father had really kept everything. I slumped on my bed and I had to laugh about the squeak, which had been driving me crazy when I had tried to sleep there. Looking at Charlie I saw a small smile appearing on his face and I was confused. "Where's Bells? I thought school was over".

"She's at work right now, but she should be back in an hour", Charlie was hovering at the door like he wanted to be somewhere else. Seeing his uniform, I was sure he had to be on the road again. Keeping an eye on things and such. Seconds later my assumption was proved right. "I have to go now. Make yourself at home and tonight we talk".

I was almost close to tell him that I couldn't wait for that, but I caught myself in time and just nodded. It was so weird to be here again after all this time and it brought a lot of memory back, which I have really tried to forget. But not everything here had been bad, I had loved to spent time with Bella and Charlie, we had been having a lot of fun. The visits with the Blacks, Saturday fishing and having all the freedom in the world, because my Dad was usually at work weekdays and nobody was watching us. "That's all right. Maybe I'll take a walk through Forks, it has been a while".

Charlie smiled at me and the he seemed to be glad that I wasn't so hostile towards him anymore. Tipping his head he was on his way out when he threw over his shoulder that Bella was working at _Newton's_ Olympic Outfitters and that I should stop by to surprise her. I was not so against this idea and as soon as I heard the cruiser driving away I took the spare key my father had left me on the kitchen counter and started my trek through the small town. The people were glancing at me like I was a freak or an alien, (bad pun). Not so odd, everyone knew each other here and I was a stranger for them. At least for most, a few still recognized me from my time with Charlie. A group of kids, probably as old as my sister was staring curiously at me and the boys checked me clearly out. Smiling at the young teenagers I continued my way. After some time I finally could escape the feeling of being watched and entered the Newton shop. The first person I saw was a cute boy looking Longley at something, his eyes intently trained on the object of his affection. Following his sight I realized that he was staring at Bella. Clearing my throat I made my way in the direction of the love sick guy. He gasped stunned when he saw me and I rolled my eyes at him.

"Can I help you, Miss?"

I was debating with myself if I should embarrass him a little or if I should play nice. Thinking about the options I choose to behave. "No, I already found what I was looking for. But thanks for asking".

The moment I had opened my mouth I noticed the head of my sister snapping up. Shock, happiness and confusion were visible on her face. It took a while before she got her body in gear and stormed towards me, throwing her arms around my shoulders. "Oh my god! What are you doing here?"

"Charlie called. He told me that my little sister needed me and so I'm here", it was nice to see that after all the many letters we had written and phone calls we had done, we still had that special bond with each other, which was strange for half siblings like us. But we both weren't exactly normal. Example one we usually found trouble, although we weren't even looking for it at all. Example two I was in love with an alien warrior while she had gotten her heart broken from a vampire boy.

Bella released her chokehold on me to look at my face, like she wanted to make sure that it was really me. I had to smile when I saw her cheeks getting this nice rose color. "I can't believe you're here. Not after the fight with Dad. What did he offer you to come to Forks?"

I rolled my eyes, having forgotten that she knew how my relationship with Charlie was really and that she had been present when I told him that I never wanted to see him again. She hadn't understood everything at the time, but after the entire long times we had talked she got my point, although she had often hinted that I should get over my anger towards him, because he loved me and he was my father and such. "Nothing, I came because he's worried about you and he thought you would need a female presence in your life right now".

"I'm glad you're here", Bella's face fell and I instantly noticed why Charlie had the feeling to be out of his water. I knew that expression and I even knew how it felt to lose someone you loved so much that you couldn't imagine to live without. Seconds later she seemed to realize that we weren't alone so she dropped her sadness and smiled slightly at the boy standing with us. "Hey Mike, that's my sister Maria. Maria that's my friend Mike Newton".

I saw the poor boy wince at the mention of friend and I was sure that he wouldn't be so aversed to be more to her. But after having witnessed the misery of my sister, I was positive that no one could replace the hole that Edward had left for a very long time. "Oh you're the famous Mike I heard about. It's nice to have finally a face to the name".

Mike started to get really nervous with us looking at him. His eyes darted from me to Bella and back again. I know that he must be wondering how we were related because we didn't look exactly alike. She was a mix between Charlie and Renee while I was almost completely my mom, well except for the hair of course. "Yeah, I can say the same about you".

"So Mike, when is my little sister allowed to leave. I've got tons of plans for us for today", I looked at the deserted shop and realized that in all the time I had been here just two hikers had been inside. These two men were in a heated conversation about seeing a huge grizzly, who was taller than average. But I didn't exactly pay much attention to them, because it wasn't so unusual to come across a bear in Forks, especially up north in the woods.

Mike glanced at the same direction I had been staring at and he seemed to realize that nothing much was going on. Making a face he appeared like he would have loved to spend more time with my sister, but couldn't find a good excuse to keep her here. Sighing he turned to us. "She can go. After those two are finished I will be closing the shop anyway".

Bella smiled for real this time, squeezing the boys arm before pulling off a vest I hadn't seen before on her. Putting it away she got her jacket and sprinted towards me. When we went outside we both called goodbye to Mike. Instantly we giggled like idiots and I knew that Charlie did the right thing by informing me about the state of my sister. She really needed me, someone having experienced the same thing and was still breathing. As soon as we stopped at some big red monster.

"Why haven't you taken a bigger car?"

Bella rolled her eyes dramatically, something she had picked up from me. She had done that a lot, always looking up at me and it had bothered me at first. But then mom had told me that I as her older sister was some inspiration for her. At that I started to enjoy messing with her. "Dad brought it for me and I love it. Billy Black had owned it before me".

I had to smile at the mention of the name. It was strange but I hadn't thought that they would still be here, even though it was silly. Billy would never leave La Push and Jacob had to be what now? Sixteen? He was probably still in school. "How are he and Jake?"

"Good, although I haven't seen them in a while. Not since Pro....", she stopped in midsentence, her eyes getting glassy all of the sudden and I remembered what she meant. Prom, where Edward had taken her, much to her displeasure.

I hated to see that look in her face and I finally realized why Alex had been so strange with me in the summer where Michael had told me that he loved me and that broke up with me. That had to have been the same expression I had been sporting at the time. " Hey, what do you say about a big pizza, a bad horror movie, lots of unhealthy soda and so much candy that we'll spent our night leaning over the toilet?".

Bella didn't make an impression like she was really excited to do that. But she didn't want to disappoint my poor attempt of cheering her up. For a moment I thought she would decline my offer and I was prepared to kick her ass for my effort to distract her. Then she surprised me. "Okay".

"Great, we will have so much fun, even if it kills you".

Three hours later we sat huddled on the couch in the dark living room, snuggled into the fluffy blanket, the last remains of our big grub strewn over the table in front of us and Saw 4 playing on the TV. The female police officer was just in the process to get ripped apart when Charlie got back from his shift. Startled we both screamed and threw the blanket over our heads, trying to hide us from the killer. But as soon as we heard the heavy boots getting pulled off we knew that we were save and came out.

Bella looked a little funny with her hair all over the place and her face paler than it had been already. I always knew that she was not so tough like her older sister. "Hey Dad. How was your day?"

" What are you watching?", he was suspiciously looking at me when he heard the woman in the movie scream while she was cut open and her inside was falling out, splattering loudly and disgustingly on the ground with a sickening sound.

I rolled my eyes, because I knew that he didn't approve of that kind of genre in his home. He always thought these movies would just put wrong ideas in our young and innocent heads. What a bunch of bull. "It's just some horror movie. Bella wasn't so fond of my taste so I let her pick".

Charlie shook his head his expression telling me everything I needed to know. Not even a day in his house and he wanted to fight with me, continuing our little differences from before. "You know I don't like these movies".

"It's fiction and not real, we know that. And we won't run around and kill people because we saw it on TV", I hated to see that look in his eyes, making me feel unwanted and unworthy to be here. He was the one calling me to come here and now I regretted that I've done that, even though I wouldn't be at this place if not for my sister.

Before Charlie could retort something Bella jumped in, sensing that some nasty confrontation would be following. She got to her feet and put herself between me and our father, making her position clear to us. "Could you not do that? I can't stand to have you both at each other throats all the time".

I realized that she was right and that she had enough problems at the moment. She didn't need our quarrels to top of that. Standing up I decided to be the better person and avoid any situation that could get me in trouble. "I think that's my cue to go to bed. Good night".

Without waiting for a reply I made my way into our old room, immediately slumping on my squeaky mattress. Putting my head into my pillow I let my frustration out, wishing Bella wouldn't be here so I could tell my father what I thought of him. Thankfully I still had my imagination and I occupied myself with planning to put Charlie down in my mind. At some point I fell asleep, because the next thing I knew I was sitting on Michael's couch at his home in Roswell, the same blanket laying folded over the back of it with his smell lingering on every surface around me. Inhaling deep I instantly felt like I was at the place where I was supposed to be, a place that I felt most comfortable, aside from my mother's house of course.

"I knew you would come here".

I whirled around at the familiar voice and before I registered what I was doing I was already halfway running towards my spaceboy. Throwing my arms around him I pressed myself so tight at his body that I almost knocked the air out of him. But to my defence I was so happy to have him so close again, which was stupid I know. It wasn't even a whole day and I missed him so much. "It's so good to see you".

Michael put his right arm on the back of my head while his other was holding me strongly. His warmth and his unique smell were surrounding me and I knew that everything would be alright in my little universe. "Yeah I feel the same way. I couldn't wait to try your theory about our connection, I just had to make sure that you're unhurt and safe in Forks".

" Tell my again why I ditched you to stay in my personal hell?", I pushed my head into the small hollow of his shoulder, enjoying this moment and wishing to never leave this place again, especially when he wouldn't stop to stroke my back like that anytime soon.

Michael chuckled and it rumbled deep in his chest, which in return made me feel it to. He had probably asked himself the same question over and over again. He outside from Liz and Alex was the only one knowing how much I despised my father for not making an effort to keep me in his life. "Because your sister needed you and you love her".

I pouted, although I knew that he wouldn't be able to see it. He was right and I hated him for it. But maybe I was overreacting, I mean maybe Charlie and I needed a little more time to find a way to each other again and that wouldn't happen in this short time. "Great, next time I've got such an idea, please slug me with something big".

"There won't be a next time, because I don't let you go alone again. I already pissed everyone off and you're not even gone that long", he was serious and it warmed my heart to know that he was missing me as much as I was missing him. He wasn't usually one for confessing his true feelings, but when he did it was wholeheartly and honest.

This was the reason why I loved that boy and stayed with him through all the bullshit. And now it was my opportunity to chuckle when I imagined him as his normal self with the others, snapping at them or just growling or maybe even grunting. Pushing myself away from him I looked in his eyes. "What did you do to them?"

He immediately got defensive, something that wasn't such a surprise with his nature. Everyone always assumed that everything was mostly his fault and he hated that. But truthfully not everybody knew how to take him and his strange behaviour. "I didn't do anything. I just sat there and told them to keep their mushy feelings for themselves, so that I could eat without having the urge to puke it out again".

"They just want to enjoy the last moments with each other. In a few days everyone will split up and they don't have the chance to see each other for a long time", it was so sweet that he was in a bad mood because of me and some part of me felt great. I was tempted to tease him with it, but as much as he had changed in many aspects I knew that he would retreat as soon as he would notice that I was making fun of him.

Michael scowled at me for a moment and it was very apparent that I hit the nail right on the head. He was finally realizing what it meant that we were apart and he didn't like the way it felt to have me so far away from him. "I miss you and I hate that you're gone from me. Part of my worries that you will get in trouble without me and another part of me is glad that you're out of danger. But that doesn't change the fact that I wish you would be here at my side".

I nearly started to cry at his words. Cupping his face I kissed him, putting all my emotions in this kiss. I knew that it wouldn't be real and I didn't care at the moment. We would just have that opportunity for as long as it was too dangerous to be with each other again. Until then we had to bear with this make believe world, meeting in our dreams and enjoy every minute we would have. It would be all we've got and I was determined to spend it to the fullest. Michael seemed to have the same thought because before I realized what was happening I was lying with my back on the couch our clothes either in the process to disappear or already falling on the ground. His hands were all over my body while my hands did the same. Everything felt so real that I shut my mind off just to give myself into the pleasure.

"I'm so glad that we did this in our dream or I would be sure Charlie would hunt you down right now", I mumbled into this chest, still riding on our afterglow. If I would have known how passionate he could with me somewhere else I would have already moved to Forks a long time ago.

Michael said nothing, his right hand trailing feather light over my naked back. He wasn't a talker after the exchanged of body fluids and most of the time he just listened to me, sometimes even acknowledging my questions with a nod or a shake. But other than that he was quiet.

I looked up at him, just to make sure that he was still there with me. He seemed to be deep in thoughts and I was confused. He should be happy, glowing and joyfully singing inside and not frown at something. "What's up?"

"I just thought about the moment when I would wake up and realize that you're not there".

Yeah the realization had hit me, too earlier. But what other option did we have if we wanted to be with each other despite the distance between us? Could I ask him to come here to Forks and make himself a target for the FBI? No, I would never do that to him and I could never be selfish enough to decide to go with him and make him weaker. "What are you saying? You don't want us to meet like this?"

Instantly his arms tightened around me, keeping me trapped with him. His eyes flashed dangerously at me and I knew that I probably interpretended his words wrong. "No of course not. I've enjoyed every moment and believe me after tonight you won't get rid of me that easily. But we just have this small amount of time until reality catches up with us and it makes me sad".

"Don't. We have more than other couples have living so far apart from each other. We should treasure this. Besides we have something we can look forward every day until the day we get tired of each other", which I hoped would never come or at least not in the near future. I mean the guy was driving me crazy without much effort on his part, but I loved him to pieces and after I saw what Bella was going through and how it looked to the outside world I didn't want to make this experience again.

Michael was just in the process to reply something when a high pitched scream was startling us both. He was immediately on his feet, glancing around to find the source of the sound while I recognized the voice. I stood up from the couch and walked towards him to say goodbye, knowing that I was needed. "I have to go. Meet me tomorrow at the same time".

Before he could stop me, I was already gone waking up in my own bed. Quickly I jumped to my feet and stormed to my sister. She was clutching her chest, seemingly having woken up from a nightmare. Instantly I wrapped my arms around her, to give her a little comfort. It was hard to witness this misery just after I spent such a great time with my fiancé. "Shhh, everything's over. Nothing will hurt you now. I'm here and I will protect you".

"There are things you can't protect me from", she whispered through her tears, making me realize that it was true. I couldn't protect her from broken hearts and boys trampling on her feelings. But I could be there for her and pick her up. I would be the best sister in the world and if that meant I had to swallow all my nasty remarks towards my father, than I would do that too.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

_**New faces and old friends**_

After the horrible rest of the night where I didn't get a moment of shut eye, I was glad that my sister looked as bad as I felt. I didn't know why she woke up screaming and she hadn't told me what she had been dreaming about, but I was sure that it was about Edward. I just wished she would talk to me about it, tell me what was bothering her so much, but she was tight lipped about everything and so I backed off. Charlie was gone when we got down in the kitchen and made us something to eat before Bella had to be in school. I watched her poking sadly in her bowl of cereal, not eating and just looking miserable.

"Okay, I give up. I can't watch you like this and not being able to do something. What can I do to help you?", it was hard to witness someone mourning the loss of another one so much. I hoped that I hadn't looked half as bad, because then I had to apologize to everyone I knew. It was like seeing a person you loved slowly dying in front of your eyes without having the ability to change anything.

Bella glanced up from her breakfast, her eyes empty and her expression so heart breaking that I could barely stand it. She had lost everything that had made her this funny girl everyone wanted to hang out with. But she wasn't even a tenth of this person anymore. "You can't do anything. Just let me work through everything. I won't do anything stupid I promise".

I stretched my arm over the table and grasped her hand firmly in mine. Immediately I touched the cold spot, the scar she had left from James. It was always a reminder about the love Edward had been having for her. I couldn't understand what had made him treating my sister like that after all the things he had done for her. I couldn't believe that everything he said should have been a lie. "Maybe you should listen to Charlie and take a little time out with Renee. She would love to have you living under her roof again".

"I'm so sick of everyone telling me what it's best for me. Why can't you just leave me be", she exploded, wrenching her hand away and punching it on the table with all her might. Standing up she glared down at me and for the first time I saw a small part of the old Bella peeking through the dark mood.

I followed her example and put myself in front of her, not in a threatening way just that she would know I was with her. I didn't want to scare her away, but I couldn't exactly sit by and watch her getting more depressed every day. "I'm sorry; we're just worried about you. I've been through the same and believe me it hadn't been a cake walk. I had to see him every day in school, on the street and even at work. I saw the way he was talking to Isabel, which I thought was my biggest enemy at the point and it almost got me killed. Trust me when I say that it taken a lot of me to get over the hurt and as soon as I accepted the pain I started to heal. Maybe you should start talking to your friends or maybe your best friend about it. Or you should start a journal for your thoughts, to get everything off your chest".

Bella stared at me and for a moment I thought I'd gotten through to her. But as soon as the thought was finished the expression was gone. She went back to her Zombie mood I had noticed she was in. She wasn't fully there, just going through the motions without noticing anything around her. "You're not like me. You had been always the stronger one".

"You're much stronger than you think. He's gone and you have to start living your life again. I know it hurts so much right now that you think you would rather die than facing another day where you realize that he will never come back, but one day everything will be over and you will laugh how silly you acted in this moment", I hated the way Bella was always downplaying herself like that. She was better than she wanted to accept and sometimes I had envied her for the easy way she had been taking everything coming her way. Whereas I had been more on the emotional side she had taken more after Charlie, who was usually putting on a good show with a small touch of sarcasm. I had never managed that and it had been hard for me to realize that I had been so different from them.

Bella shook her head, tears gathering in her eyes and I knew that I had to be careful with the next step. I could either break her walls down or I could push her further behind it. After the way she was clutching her chest like she was in pain I was sure that I should make a retreat until she was more stable to have this conversation.

Worriedly I put my arms around her, feeling slightly guilty for causing her so much misery again. Caressing her back I whispered in her ear that I was sorry and I was just trying to help. I felt so much like Charlie right now, making a fruitless attempt to do what we thought was best for Bella and in return just made things worse. Even though I knew that it would make her feel a lot better if she would start talking I was sure that pushing her wouldn't accomplish anything besides scaring her away from us. "Why don't you dress for school while I do the dishes? I'm driving you today".

"You don't have to do that. I'm old enough to manage that alone", Bella was probably afraid that I would start asking questions again and she wanted to avoid that. But in that case she didn't have to fear anything.

Kissing her cheek I pushed her in the direction of the stairs leading to our room upstairs. That girl would surely be the reason for my first grey hair at this young age. Watching her slowly going up I finally lost the battle with my poor acting skills. Slumping on the nearest chair I put my hand in my hands and breathed deeply. It was hard to see her going down so quickly and to watch her refusing every helping hand stretched towards her. I knew that I had tons of work to do with her and it would take a long time. Rubbing my temples I tried to make a plan for today, seeing as I would be here for a while and that meant I had to look for a job so that I was busy when Bella was at school. Maybe I should ask around town, someone would surely hire me, seeing as I was Chief Swan's daughter. Sighing I stood up and put on my happy face when I heard loud steps coming down, I didn't want to depress my sister more than she was already. She wasn't looking so horrible any longer, but there was still this sadness in her expression that was telling everything. "Let's go. We don't want you to be late".

Bella walked in front of me and even her steps were different than I was used from her. She was ducking, making herself smaller and that was so wrong. She shouldn't try to blend in with the crowd, she should do the opposite. As soon as we sat in the Jetta she put the music off and I was a little confused about the fact, but didn't comment on her behaviour. The short drive to her high school was mostly silence, which got broken from me once in a while. But after I always received half mumbled answers I stopped trying to make conversation. I parked the car in front of the entrance and a few people stared at us. Probably not used that Bella would be coming without her red truck. "Thanks for driving me. And I'm sorry if I'm not myself right now. But give me time".

"I will try to do that. But remember that you can talk to me whenever you want. I'm always here for you and you can always tell me everything, even if it should sound a little crazy".

For the first time she really smiled at me and I knew that she had received my message. I instantly realized that she was very thankful that I was there, although she couldn't really show it to me. "Thank you. You're the best".

I grinned at her and flicked my hair over my shoulder. Hearing her quiet laugh I knew that I managed to amuse her, at least for a small moment. I would try to do that more often in the near future and maybe one day she would be the girl I remembered. "Don't I know it? But now get your cute ass out. People are already staring".

" Great, more attention", mumbling something incoherent that just her could understand she jumped out of the car and walked with her head down towards the building. People seemed to step out of her way whenever she walked in their direction.

I was pretty concerned about her lack of joy in her life that I feared she could do something so stupid like me when I had been at the same point. Looking down at my right wrist I saw the reminder of my stupidity blinking at me. A scar was there, always making me remember that nothing could be so bad to take away your own life for it. Yes, I had been playing with the thought to kill myself by slitting my wrist. Unfortunately the moment I changed my mind my mom came into the bathroom, startling me and that wasn't such a good idea considering I had a razor blade in my hand, which was still hovering over my skin. I cut myself pretty deep, but thankfully not deadly. After a long lecture from my mother, a few threats to see a shrink and her rant about hunting down some boy having done that to her daughter, I realized that I had to change. Which had been the reason for the longer hair, the shorter skirts and the new attitude. Nobody ever found out the real reason for the scar, not even Alex or Liz. The only people in the known had been me, the doctor and my mother. But maybe it would help me get through to my sister when she knew that I wasn't as stung as she thought I was. Hearing the school bell ringing loudly I finally realized that I should probably get going or else someone would be curious for why I was still there. Putting the car in gear I drove in the direction of the main street where most of the shops in town were. Not even twenty minutes later and I had a nice job in a small boutique. It wasn't exactly the most modern clothes, but for Forks it was doable and I would getting paid for telling people how fabulous they were looking in their outfits, at least I wasn't a waitress again. On my way to the jetta I almost stumbled into a man in a wheelchair.

"I'm so sorry sir".

A rough and pretty familiar chuckle was heard and I was stunned to hear that voice so soon. "Why so formal, Maria?"

I looked closer at the man and was a little shocked to see Billy Black, his face hadn't changed so much in the time I had been gone. But to see him not walking on his own two feet was a surprise for me. "Hey, it has been a long time. What happened?"

"Some accident", he made a gesture with his hand that made it obvious that he didn't want to talk about it and I knew a wink when I saw one. "What brought you here? I thought you never wanted to see Charlie again".

I smiled sheepishly at him, knowing that he probably thought I was the worst daughter in the world for having said that to my own father. I forgot that he had been present when I launched my words at Charlie. "Well things change and besides I'm here for Bella. Dad thought she would need her sister and so I came".

Billy took my hand and patted it tenderly. His smile was earnest and it instantly brightened my mood, too. That had been the reason why I had felt so homey at La Push, the warm nature of the Blacks. "You're a good person. And Charlie is surely ecstatic that you're here. He had really missed you, you know. He's not so bad like you think he is, he loves you. Even if he can't show it".

"I know how he is and that has nothing to do with his closed off character", sighing I felt immediately bad for letting my frustration out on the wrong person. I should be furious with my dad and not with Billy. He had always been there for me when I had needed him and I would be always thankful for that. "Sorry for snapping. But it's still a touchy subject for me".

Billy nodded, understanding clearly visible in his dark eyes. Suddenly he sat up straighter in his chair and his grin widened. He was looking at something behind me and for a moment I was afraid it was Charlie. "Hey Jacob, look who's finally find her way back to Forks".

I turned around and I was stunned into absolute silence. The last time I saw Jake he had been a small boy, hanging around us with his many stories he usually told us. I still remembered him with his red fire truck and the noises he had always made with the thing, driving me and Bella crazy. But now he was huge, his long, black hair bound to a ponytail and his white teeth a stark contrast to his dark russet skin. "Oh my god. You've grown into such a beautiful young man".

"Ria is that you? Wow, Roswell definitely did you real good", Jacob eyed me from head to toe, making me a little flushed when I noticed the gleam in his eyes. Yeah he really was a man now.

I couldn't help myself when I saw him smile at me and so I hugged him, although it was rather funny looking with him so tall. I felt like a dwarf compared to him. I was still amazed how familiar everything was. "It's good to see you. Finally someone sane around here".

Jacob laughed and the motion was slightly shaking me. I almost felt normal in his presence, because he didn't know about my involvement with aliens or FBI agents. I was just plain old Maria in his eyes and that was a nice stroke to my ego. "Charlie already driving you mad, huh?"

"No, this time it's not him. I'm talking about Bella", I pushed myself away from him, trying to watch his reaction and find out how much he knew. I didn't want to reveal too much to him and hurt my sister in the process again.

Jacob's eyes darkened and I immediately knew that he was aware what had happened with Bella. His jaw was moving angrily under his skin and I realized that I should have probably shut my mouth about this topic. "Yeah, I heard the Cullen's left and she's not handling it well".

I saw in his expression that he didn't like the vampire family very much and I didn't know why. I mean as much as I had read from my sister's letters they had been good and everyone respected them. Aside from their strange behaviour and their odd appearance, well and the fact that they hadn't been human, they had been relative normal. "She's more than that. I'm afraid she will do something stupid and I won't be able to stop her from doing it".

"She will get over it. Besides she's better off without HIM".

Again I picked up that hostile vibe as soon as he spoke and it was bugging me. There was something that I wasn't getting obviously. Strange, maybe Jacob knew about the vampire thing and that was the reason for his reaction. "You don't like Edward, do you?"

He startled at my accusation, surely not used to have someone say what was on their mind or that was straight coming to the point. "No, not really. Not after what he had done to Bella".

"And what has he done to her? Did he hurt her? Cheat on her?", I was worried that Bella hadn't told me everything. If Edward as much had laid a finger on violence on my sister he would have to fear me. Not Charlie, not Van Helsing and not any other Vampire, just lil´old me.

Jacob seemed to recognize my darkening mood and he appeared like he was pleased to have someone else not liking the vampire boy. But then he recovered and his face showed me that it wasn't so bad like I thought it was. "No, he just left and hurt Bella".

Finally it dawned on me why he was reacting so strangely. A wide smile was spreading before I could control it. It was so sweet and if I wouldn't have known how much my sister still loved Edward I would tell Jake to go for it. "You've got a crush on her!"

"Yeah ever since she came back. He can't stop talking about her and it's driving me and his friends crazy", Billy added with a grin, seemingly as amused about this development than I was. It was pretty odd to imagine both with each other, because Bella was almost two years older than Jacob.

I patted Jakes belly lightly with my hand while trying to tone down the smile on my face. He was one of the good guys, as much as I could tell and he would be good for my sister. Unfortunately she was like me in that area and that meant she was tending more to the bad guys. "That's so cute. I think you would be perfect for her".

Jacob stared at me like I said something weird. But it was just the truth. He was normal, he would do everything for her and they knew each other since childhood. So he was meeting all my criteria's. "Unfortunately she doesn't see that".

"Maybe not now, but someday. Until that happens we should do something together. I think it would be good for us to spend a little time with each other", I just had to convince Bella about that. But I didn't think she would be against the idea to go down to La Push, like me she had been having really good memories of that place.

Jacob smirked at me, making him look more mature and giving him something that was absolute adoring. "I would love that. Call me as soon as you know anything concrete".

I embraced him again, because I still wanted to do a little exploring before I had to get Bella from school and that meant I had to say goodbye to them right now. "I will do that", then I did the same to Billy and waved on my way to my car.

That night Michael was already waiting for me when I slept. Ironically he was sitting at his usual booth in the crash down when I stepped inside the dining area, of course with the antennas on my head and the short uniform on my body. Huffing I sat across from him, startling him out of his thoughts.

"I'm very disappointed. So many places you could imagine and this is what you come up with?", I waved my arms around me, indicating what I meant. It wasn't the worst place, but I had spent so much time in this joint that I didn't want be there in my dreams as well.

Michael smiled at me and it still surprised me when he did that, it made him so unbelievable beautiful that it almost took my breath away. And it made me realize how much I missed him and the fact that I just could see him in this dream plane. "Hey, this is the place where I first fell in love with you. I like it here".

I was amazed how casual he could talk about his feelings and that even loud with me in the room. Bending over the table I kissed him quickly, just to say hello and to make myself happy after the strange evening with my "family". "Hi. I'm glad you came".

"Of course I came, I was curious what had been going on last night with your sister. You disappeared so fast that I was afraid she was getting attacked or something", Michael took my hand and his thumb was rubbing over my skin tenderly. It was instantly calming me and everything bad was retreating into the back of my mind again.

My expression dropped at the mention of last night, making me remember that I had a long way ahead of me. Bella had been quiet when I got her from school, ignoring her friends completely on her way to the car. Charlie wasn't any help at all and as soon as it had looked like we would be starting a fight I bailed. "No, she just had a bad dream. According to my dad this wasn't the first time she woke up screaming. I'm worried about her, she's so closed off and I'm afraid she will do something stupid".

Michael turned my hand around, making the scar visible in the light. One of his fingers's trailed over the spot. "You mean something stupid like you did?"

"How did you know?", strange that I thought he hadn't realized that I lied about the scar and that I underestimated him. He was far more perspective than I gave him credit for. But maybe it was just that I didn't want him to think that I had been weak, that he had been so important to me that I would have rather died than spending another day without him.

Michael raised a perfect eyebrow, like he wanted to tell me that he wasn't so dumb like I thought he was, which was BS because I knew he was smarter than he believed. His finger was still caressing my most guarded secret aside from the alien thing. "I have eyes. And I saw it in one of our flashes"

I wanted to pull my hand back, wanted to stand up and go. This had been something I hadn't wanted him to see. It as humiliating and my worst moment. I had been a coward at the point, pathetic and really weak. I knew what he thought about that. "You have to think that was stupid for doing that and you're right. That was the only thing I regret in my life".

"Yeah it had been stupid to do that, especially because of me. But I wasn't exactly innocent in that area myself", he pushed the sleeve of his black sweater back and showed me the many thin lines on his forearm, the scars he had told me were from the training with his power. "I cut myself to stop the pain of letting you go".

I was stunned speechless about this confession, having thought that the break up, which had been coming from him hadn't been so bad for him like it had been for me. It was strange to hear him tell me that he had been exactly as stupid as I had been. "We're both pathetic. Thank god that we have each other or else we would be alone forever".

Michael smiled slightly at the implication and I instantly realized that he had wanted to do that for the rest of his life, because of the fear of not trusting anyone with his secret. "Yeah, it's a shame that I will miss a life of sleeping with different girls with no attachment".

"If you think like that then I won't stand in your way", getting on my feet I had to do everything in my powers to keep my amusement off my expression. He shouldn't think that I was joking. Sticking my nose up in the air I was forcefully turning my body around to walk away.

Unfortunately it took Michael two seconds to grasp my arm and pull me tightly on his lap. His grip was strong but not hurtful and he was trying to get me to look at him, which I refused by struggling away from his hands. "Maria, come on. I had been just messing around. You know that I wouldn't trade you for anything in this world".

Now that got a reaction out of me, I mean he was so talkative and honest here. Usually he didn't say such mushy things to me that had been more Max´ thing. But my spaceboy would never utter anything that could sound a little romantic. "Oh really? You never said that before".

"You never had been so far away from me either. This being apart sucks majorly", he pressed his face in my hair while his hands held me prisoner in his embrace.

I was a little relieved to know that he was just as much suffering as I was. I mean it had been my idea, but that didn't mean I had to like it. I loved my sister and I was sure that me being here would help someday, however I was frustrated to have my spaceboy so far away from me." I know, but we'll be together again one day. I feel like I have to be here right now. Charlie doesn't know anything about girl's with broken hearts, whereas I have experience in that matter".

Immediately as soon as the words left my lips I felt Michael stiffen and the breath leaving his lungs in one big whiff. I forgot that he was the reason for my pain. He was still a little sensitive about that subject. "Yeah because of me".

"Don't beat yourself up over that. It's past us and I haven't been so perfect myself", turning my body around I took his face in my hands. I don't why how often we had talked about this topic and how many times he told me that he was sorry for doing something that he thought was the right thing. We both had been idiots, no big deal.

Michael snuggled into my hand before kissing my palm softly, his eyes never leaving me. It was so strange to have him so open to me and if he wasn't careful I would get used to it, expecting something like that every time we met. A promise I would probably never get from him, he was weird in that. "Then it's really good we have each other. And I hope it stays that way or I will personally come to Forks to get nasty".

I smiled at his jealousy, even though there was no reason. Firstly the guys here were either too old or too young and I was perfectly content with the ring on my finger, always a reminder about the promise I had given Michael. "That won't happen. Nobody is able to hold my interest here. Please the last place I would pick a guy would be Forks".

"Then why is your ring missing?", he pointed at the naked finger where his gift should have been. I grimaced at the glare directed at me, although it didn't seem to be too serious, which didn't mean he wouldn't get pissed if I wouldn't have a good excuse.

Thankfully I had that and it would even hold in court. "My sister has been dumped from the love of her life. I don't want to flounce my happiness in her face. Besides I don't want to cause more fight with Charlie, at least as long as Bella is still so sensitive about the tension between us".

He seemed to believe me because the expression in his face changed instantly. It was still worried, but the hard lines disappeared. And even though something was bothering him he pulled me closer to his body, caressing my hair. "Is she so bad? She's not the first to get her heart broken".

"I don't understand it myself, it's much worse than I expected. At least I went through the four phases of break up, which meant I was crying a lot, ate my body weight in ice cream, I cursed your name endlessly, imagined you painful passing away and then I accepted everything with changing my appearance. But she seems to be stuck on phase one without the crying".

Michael chuckled at my description of a break up from the side of a female while his hands didn't stop stroking my head. Something at that was lulling all my senses, like he was really with me. "Give her time. She'll open up when she's ready and then you'll be there for her like the good sister you are".

I put my head on his shoulder, hoping that he was right about that. I couldn't watch my sister like that any longer, it was hurting me to see her suffering like that and I hated to feel helpless. But maybe I just had to have patience and Bella would come to me in her time. Either way I had to keep myself back and someday everything would get back in track. At least in theory.

TBC


End file.
